While Ethical Non-Monogamous people are mostly loving and accepting, we have boundaries. One thing as a community that I do not tolerate is harem hunters and unicorn hunters. Before I get into why let’s break down each term and why these terms should be abolished from then ENM space and dating in general.

Harem Hunters are men who will make all parties aware that he is seeing other women and have no intention on building a life with said women. There needs for women are purely for sexual pleasure. Further more they will enforce a OPP (One Penis Policy) because of their lack of security in oneself. The also have expectations of group sex amongst the women he is currently seeing.

Now there is a big difference between a harem hunter and a polygamist man. A polygamist man truly cares for the well being of his wives. He assumes the responsibility of a monogamous husband times how many wives he has chosen. It is not about what the wives can do for the husband where harem hunters are selfish and are focused on what the man wants and not the collective.

Unicorn Hunters are couples that are looking for a third person to join their relationship. The biggest issues I have with not just the term but the process is a majority of couples that do this have purely sexual intentions. There is no accountability for the well being of the third party. If you wish not to have emotional accountability and want to make things more spicy in the bedroom, hire a pro. It is perfectly fine to want a additional person in your relationship as long as the intention is to care for all parties involved equally and not taking advantage of said third party.

There is nothing wrong with trying to find the right situation that will lead you to love and happiness. However it should never be at the expense of taking advantage of others. Hunters look for prey. Last I checked we are people, not prey.