Upon first speaking to Mail Man I wasn’t sure if a post would come out of it or not. After spending time with him yesterday which was such a clumsy plan from start to finish on my part, he became interesting. I’m still feeling him out for reason that I rather not say. Assumptions are horrible to make so I want to play things through here.

This is my first match on OKC that ended up going somewhere. On paper for me he checks all the boxes: good looking, tall, nerdy and polyamorous. Even the sound of his voice is nice. Oddly though I felt no spark. He invited me to hang with him during his work route and I figured why not. Maybe a in person interaction is what I needed.

I get there and spend at least 2-3 hours with him. Felt no spark and it was frustrating me. Was the interaction bad ? Not at all. We laughed, talked about life and had a good time considering this wasn’t a date per say. Is this because of past trauma from my ex ? Desires of rekindling what was loss ?

I tell myself this when I ask myself these questions: Nothing will ever be the same again, either adjust or don’t bother dating at all and be miserable. So when the opportunity presented itself yesterday to spend time with him I took the opportunity. Even though I messed up and he was more than forgiving. As we played games and watched Netflix I noticed a few qualities that made Mail Man grow on me.

I have no idea what is developing here but I do know is that I don’t mind it. I think as time goes on and I open up more, letting go of preconceived ideas and take things moment by moment, its possible something better will come of all of this then I expect.