Ya know I’ve just about had it up to here with people using polyamory to excuse their shitty behavior. Let’s take this from the top about what happened on Tik Tok and how the tolerance level for condoning this behavior is an absolute zero. Below zero if that’s even a thing.
Modernwarrior aka Lance and Chelseahartisme aka Chelsea are two big content creators that embarked on a romantic relationship behind closed doors. Without sharing any intimate details they were very close and Lance was “there” for Chelsea during her times of need and gained her trust. Lance then brings up the topic of polyamory and would that be something that interest her. Chelsea made it ABUNDANTLY clear that she was not interested in that relationship dynamic. Here is where the problems come in.
Now I can’t speak for Lance that his interest in polyamory was genuine at first. However his actions to follow were deceitful and manipulative. He lead Chelsea to believe that they were practicing monogamy, when in reality he was telling another woman the same thing as Chelsea and was dating both of them simultaneously. Let me be clear. THAT IS NOT POLYAMORY ! THAT IS BEING AN ASSHOLE !
Once you speak to your partner about any ENM style for that matter and they say no that’s it. Poly Lesson #2 covers not forcing polyamory on someone your dating and why. What was done here was uninformed consent and major violation of trust. Polyamory is far from perfect. People still cheat and do shitty things in this community however holding one accountable for said behavior can be easier to do. No matter the relationship dynamic, accountability is paramount when wrong doing is done in dating, love and relationships.
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