So that trip to Chicago I was suppose to go on this weekend (Jan 28th – 31st), not happening anymore. In my latest post here, I express that I think he ghosted me. That was definitely me putting on a brave face. Him going radio silent for me was devastating. The last time I spoke to him before today (Jan 25th) was Jan 18th.

Now I try my very best to be a reasonable person. My gut told me he didn’t stand me up but PTSD of other situations caused me to tailspin out slightly. I’m so grateful to have my husband in my life. He reassured me that I didn’t do anything and to be patient and see. I knew he was right but the way dating is setup at times there is no rhyme nor reason for people ghost people. I mean I watched a few episodes of Ghosted on MTV. People are strange.

Hoping that he didn’t ghost me has been the worse feelings since my ex. Yesterday I had completely given up hope. Downloaded the apps again to avoid crying and breaking down because deep down I knew I was overacting but nothing in life as they say is a guarantee. In the middle of my work day today he finally messaged me.

He had a death in the family and his health took a dip. I was just happy to hear from him. I was happy that I didn’t do anything to ruin it. I was happy that there is still a chance of developing something. All in all I’m happy that he not only apologized for lack of communication several times but that he is still interested in me.

Remember Ex Lesson #5, definitely putting that into action. I was too focused on this one guy when I should have a rooster. Until someone I’m seeing says to me that they want to be my boyfriend, the rooster is open. I might have two guys or twenty, the fact is that actions do speak. Also most people aren’t ready for a relationship and that’s fine. I need to let loose and have some casual fun even though its not in my demisexual nature. Nobody every dies and said they wish they had less sex, am I right ?